In Valheim, A God Rattling Boar Sank My Boat


Illustration for article titled A God Damn Boar Sank My Boat

Screenshot: Espresso Stain Publishing / Kotaku

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Many survival video games function animals you possibly can hunt for crafting provides and sustenance. Solely in Valheim do they get revenge. Nautical revenge.

My buddies and I’ve had some good occasions within the surprise-hit survival recreation. We’re making bronze armor. We’re in scorching pursuit of the sport’s second main boss, The Elder. Final evening, I killed two gigantic trolls and made them into garments. Our bees, mercifully, are completely satisfied. We’re not setting up Sauron’s tower or harpoon-blasting ourselves into area (but), however we’re making good progress by means of the Viking afterlife.

And but, I’ve acquired a mortal enemy who’s…humble in stature: a fucking boar. In Valheim, boars will not be meant to be formidable. Certainly, you possibly can even tame them. Positive, wild boars typically cost when approached, however they go down in solely a pair hits even whenever you’re wielding starter gear. I’ve realized, nevertheless, that what they lack in snorting muscularity, they make up for with persistence.

The opposite evening, I constructed a raft to sail the seas looking for The Elder. I ended up touchdown on a small island overrun with Graydwarves—mainly, tree stumps that need to annoy you so badly they turned sentient about it. And one boar. The Graydwarves had been quite a few sufficient that I needed to kite them across the island to slowly choose them off one after the other. The boar, rated two stars (learn: barely stronger than an everyday boar), received caught up on this Yakety Sax spectacle, however as soon as jabbed with my spear, determined it’d had sufficient and fled into a close-by thicket. I figured I’d hunt it down later or, ideally, by no means see it once more.

After dispatching the Graydwarf prepare, I set to selecting the island clear of provides and loot. It wasn’t a very giant island, so this took 5 minutes or so. Then I walked again to my boat. There, in waist-high water, I discovered the boar. With feral rage, it was splintering the boards of my makeshift seacraft. I did a double take. “What the fuck?” I requested aloud. Then I noticed that the boar would sink my raft if given sufficient time, so I skewered it. My raft—and the day—had been saved. Or so I assumed.

I sailed again to the mainland, the place my pal group’s base is situated, and left my tiny boat bobbing in shallow water close to the shore. I created a customized map marker so I might simply discover it once more later. Then I deposited the assets I’d discovered at our base, went to mattress within the recreation, and likewise went to mattress in actual life.

Flash ahead to the subsequent night: My associate was taking part in Valheim whereas I used to be idly gazing nothing on the web, my favourite technique to move the time till oblivion claims us all. Abruptly, she turned to me with unhealthy information:

“A boar sank your raft,” she stated.

“What????” I replied, as would anyone upon discovering out that a couple of pig had determined to wage a days-long struggle of naval subterfuge towards them.

My associate, who was coincidentally within the space to gather provides of her personal, had arrived simply after the squealing shithead managed to tusk my raft to demise. She slew it on the spot, claiming vengeance on my behalf, but in addition depriving me of the satisfaction. I logged on and sprinted to the placement simply to ensure it was my boat and never any individual else’s that now lined the briny shallows. Positive sufficient: My raft was gone. The pigs had gained.

I have no idea what, in Valheim’s code, turns boars into boat-seeking torpedoes, however in the event you resolve to assemble a naval vessel on this recreation, I’ve some recommendation for you: Cherish it whilst you can. It doesn’t matter how vigilant you’re; the pigs are coming, and also you’ll must sleep ultimately.


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